"My friend/family/acquaintance is going through ______. What can I do to help?"

Alright y'all.

This is something I feel led to share.  I don't want to bring condemnation.  I just want to share with you some things I have learned through my journey with cancer...

This post is is going to be titled: 

 

"My friend/family/acquaintance is going through ______.  What can I do to help?"

Again.  Not trying to be offensive to ANYBODY!  But sometimes, you just don't know what to do!

 

1.  Don't do something you don't feel led to do.  OR have the grace to do!  This person may not even be capable of saying "Thank You" and you need to be ok with that.

 

2.  If this situation requires a lot of appointments, gift cards help so much!  Food and especially gas!  And I know some people like to do meals, but sometimes this can be tricky if their kids are fussy eaters or food allergies.

 

3.  If they are in the hospital for a while, drop off a gift for the them or their child.  A gift brightens any persons day.  Even for a little bit! A great gift for an adult is magazines, word puzzles, or a good book!  If for a child, something they can do sitting in bed.  Littlest Pet Shop, coloring books, or something they can do one handed.  They may have an IV!

 

4.  SEND FUNNY CARDS!  A good laugh goes a long way.  Sometimes the journey is so long.  And you just need to remember to laugh!  (Thank you Renee!)

 

5.  If they have other children, or kids in general, DON'T FORGET ABOUT THEM!  Although they are not suffering in the hospital or getting a ton of pokes, they miss their Mom and Dad!  Plus, most likely, Mom and Dad are stressed to the max.  Which makes tempers short, and quality time very sparse.  This one, I feel, is HUGE!  Send them a card as well!  And if you go to visit, talk to them as well!  They need attention, too!

6.  Please don't say, "Let me know if you need anything." I know you heart is in the right place, but they will NEVER ask.  I wish they would, too.  But they won't.  I know for me, I didn't even know what to tell people how to help me!  My suggestions?  Just DO!  Show up at their house and clean it!  Or better yet, get them a gift certificate to have someone come clean their house!  (I got this as a gift, and it was WONDERFUL!)  Send a text and say, "I'm saving Friday to watch your kids, even if not for any reason other than you need a nap!"  Tell them you are doing something on some day.  They might ask for something else, or take you up on your offer!

7.  And the MOST IMPORTANT for last.  Like my dad says, "This is a marathon, not a sprint."  Depending on the situation, this situation my last for YEARS!  Other things may come up.  So, you may not be able to help babysit right now.  Or they are getting bombarded with help.  Don't give up, SAVE IT!  They will most likely need you down the road! Journey with this person you love.  Continue to send cards, years later.  Knowing someone took the time to think of you after the initial shock is INCREDIBLY meaningful.  (Thank you to all that have done this for my family!  I got one last week!  From anonymous!  Totally shocked me and made my day!) 

I don't write this for me or my family.  I write this for the other families that are suffering.  To put words out there for them!  Heck, if you are the person in the situation, share this particular page and say, "This is how you can help me!"  Well, if you agree with me that is.

Thanks for my rant.  I pray it will help somebody!

Adios!